Thoughts on Marriage

Marriage is all about Jesus. It cannot be understood apart from him. God created marriage as a living metaphor to explain salvation to us. (Read Ephesians 5 and you will see.) Marriage is where we learn to die to self. Marriage is where we learn we are not the center of the world. Marriage is where we learn to serve someone else.Marriage is where we learn to submit. Marriage is where we learn sacrificial love. Marriage is where we learn to forgive. Marriage is where we learn how imperfect we are and how much we need to die to self. Marriage is where we learn to be of Christ and not of the world. Marriage is where we see what Jesus has done for us and that he is coming back for his Bride. Jesus died that we might be made alive. In marriage we learn to die so that the marriage may thrive.

Regarding conflict in marriage: should we avoid or embrace it? Should we withdraw from conflict or engage with it? Jesus never ran away from conflict but embraced it. He embraced conflict with Satan. He embraced it with the Sadducees, Pharisees, and scribes. He embraced conflict with all kinds of sinners either to resolve the conflict through a new born faith in him or to bring to a head a person's rejection of him. True resolution of conflict isn’t compromise. Jesus never compromised. It is about collaboration—dying to self so that something new will be born.

Jesus dealt with conflict and so should we in marriage, at work, in church--in all relationships in life where we can. Some people will reject conflict resolution because they will not collaborate. Christians in marriage and in all relationships are called to collaborate with one another to resolve conflict where they can. We are ambassadors for Christ. We are in the reconciliation business by the very nature of being in Christ.